Adult Blog
Real Adults Agree…
Before I talk to you about a rubric of how to tell if you’re an adult or not- I want to go more into depth on how I personally see maturity. Without maturity, you cannot be an adult, regardless of age. You also need experience. Life experience. Too many times, some people believe that sex or getting married is the way to tell if we’re adults. Well, that’s nothing more than a sensual experience and getting married is a commitment, not a check-off marker to finally say, “I’m an adult! WOO!!”
Let’s get started!!!
I did not create a rubric to figure out if someone is an adult or not. Sorry to say, but there are just too many ways to figure that out that a rubric would be correct in people’s eyes who agree with the way I think, and incorrect otherwise. BUT there is a few key things I find that make the difference between mature and not.
The ability to move out of your parents’ house. Let’s not get rushed here, there ARE gray areas. As a matter of fact, I lived with my parents for a few months after I graduated high school! But I didn’t just live there. I paid bills, got three jobs, kept going to college, paid off my personal bills, and purchased my own food (due to my healthy recipes). I wasn’t just there. In my business Team, and close friends, we all agree that if you put in your part, and help out- that’s great. You’re much more mature than someone who just stays home, leeches off of their parents, and wishes the one job they applied for called them back. If you can manage to move out, that will give you what all our high school teachers said, “A taste of the real world.” But to be honest, it has been the best choice of my life to go from living at University dorms, to an apartment, to a house. Progressive is key, move forward as you keep moving up financially.
Taking responsibility for everything in your life. Straight forward. This is much more detailed than people think. Too many times I have group sessions with college freshman who live in an apartment by themselves and they consider they have responsibility in their lives. As I get to know a few more personally, they admit that their rent is covered by their parents, their new car that’s worth all four years of tuition was a high school graduation gift, that their choice to procrastinate was due to a few seasons on Netflix, and that the most important parts of their life are handed up or down in responsibility, but not given to themselves. This also carries on to parents. Here we go, I might get some hate mail like I always have, but some parents have the audacity to use their children as unexpected bills. That’s just wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong. There is a period of 7-9 months where a promotion, business, associate’s degree, simple planning and budgeting could have made a positive environment. Instead, other choices were made. I may not have a child of my own, but that’s because I do not want one, and being responsible will prevent an “accidental” child. Statement made, boom, period.
Living up to proper expectations. This is something that the majority of people never see in their lives. It is tough, but anyone can achieve it. Work with, or for, those who say you are worth more and/or better. NOT someone who keeps putting you down. If you are truly mature, you will not complain about pay rate, your boss, or the way “the world” treats you. Instead, you will complain and do something about it. As my audience shifts from college students to adults, the mindset does as well. College students have little to no work experience and yell, “THAT’S RIGHT!” but as I progress into 35 or older, it transitions to, “Well, you’re lucky to have a business. You don’t know how life really is.” Then I hand them a free copy of my book, and in a few weeks I receive an letter saying that they were wrong to assume based on my current lifestyle.
Heck, a little over one year ago I did all the wrong things: I complained about work, pay, vacation time, moved up or down responsibilities to my parents or friends, and only wished life was better. But I realized that was the same as being an upset 12 year old in the 60s when underage employment was legal. I needed to grow up. So I did. And so can you. You are the BEST person you can be, so be the adult and take charge of your life.
With Your Health & Success In Mind,
Coach Peter Hanz